Million Dollar Baby

I am about 90 hours away from forgetting anything and everything about a dusty, little town I lived in. Maybe I'm a little bitter for wasting my time and money, but I can't help but feel like this little hiccup will be forgotten with one or two celebratory beers.

I was looking forward to summer, now I just want to jump back into 2003. I'm nervous. I'm sure everyone is worried they won't achieve what they set out to, but I feel like I'm the right type of lazy...and with a hint of procrastination, I just might make it happen.

Slow to the punchline, slow to the pickup.

Wishing Wells

I can hear the rain belting down outside. It's soothing. Yet, I can also hear the water dripping through the vent outside, like a leaky sink. And that can be quite maddening.

I'm going to church tonight for the first time in I don't know how many years. It doesn't change anything, but it makes my family feel better. It's the least I can do for them.

Gut feelings are weird. It's hard to talk to someone and tell them that "you just know". How? It's just a feeling. But sometimes, a lot of times, those feelings are dead on. And most times for me, it's the precursor for a terrible, terrible truth.

Sad but true.

It's unfortunate that I'm finding a niche as I'm getting ready to pack my bags for a new location. It's sad but true. I can't seem to make things fall into place, although my fortune cookies are still very positive. I hope dreams do come true with a bit of work. If I get that one lucky break, I swear I will put my heart and soul into my work. I'm keeping my fingers crossed.

If you've got something to say, say it.

Though sour grapes will turn to wine...

Step by step these small, blue circles erase the lines in the sky.

I've gotten the best shuffle on my iPod the past couple hours. I feel like it sometimes reads my mind.

I think I'm officially making the transition. Maybe. Just maybe. I hope it pans out, and I hope to be panning out in the next couple months. But if dreams do come true, I never want to host the Academy Awards. I was kind of ashamed for Hugh Jackman and other presenters by the scripts they were given.

Your BA is BS if you're not doing what you love.

I changed my mind about psychology. I'm really starting to like it.

I'm starting to forget something I thought I would always remember. But I've never felt better. And I've got a handful of meaningful connections that make my world exactly what it is, and everything I've ever known.

I'd love to elaborate, but it's just not who I am.

Until the next time I find a dozen random sentences to write, take care.

Lips to ears; feedback.

I think I've spent most of my life based on perceptions of what I've watched, read, and heard. Especially throughout my short time in college. There really isn't a certain way you need to do something, anything really. I'm just starting to get this relaxed feeling--life is now what I make it. I don't need to live up to any epic expectations, just what makes me happy. It seems trivial, but it's a nice realization.

Lying: The Breakdown of an Art

I'm pretty sure I always have an alibi. I make sure I do. I'm also a very good liar. It's kind of sad. But the bonus for being an awful person/great liar is being able to pick out other people's bullshit from a mile away. I always have been good at that. There are tell-tale signs for every situation: in person, on the phone, even over the internet or texts. In person, liars tend to limit body motion and emotions are usually forced and tense. Eye contact is often avoided, and people who are creating stories usually look to their right, not the left or straight ahead. On the phone (or in person), the person may have a shaky voice and will tend to use more words than necessary to complete their sentence. Things will be more elaborate, no detail will be left out. Delay of response is also another great way to tell in any form of communication.

When you have been lying as long as I have, you learn to subconsciously block these natural reactions. I try to tell the truth more often than not, but sometimes lying comes in handy. And sometimes you lie to save your life. Sometimes you lie out of selfishness. Sometimes you lie to protect others. Whatever the case, the average person tells 3 lies in a ten minute conversation.